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4 steps to forgiveness after an affair

forgiveness after affairForgiveness After Affair

How to Forgive a Cheater

I’ve been cheated on in Bendigo once before. Because you’ve found your way to this page, you probably have, too. I know, this is a real cruddy place to be in. I’m thinking back now on when I was cheated on by my fiancee. It was 15 years ago, and we were about to get married in only two weeks. I came home early from work one day and found her in my home office, on my desk, having sex with my boss. It was the most horrible thing I’ve ever seen. To this day, I still can’t get the image out of my mind. Needless to say, we didn’t end up going through with the wedding. In fact, I got her to pack up all of her bags and move out of my house that very night. I just couldn’t bear to ever look at her again.

So, from all of that, you might be wondering why I’m writing to you about forgiving someone for having an affair. Well, since that incident occurred, I haven’t been in a single relationship. Sure, I’ve had little flings here and there, but I’ve kept all of my women at a safe distance away from my heart. Why? Well, because I don’t want to get hurt again, not like last time. I’m also totally aware of how safe and lukewarm this way of life is. That’s why I’m writing this post, to open you up to the possibility that it is possible to forgive a cheater for what they did to you. I know that it is possible in principle, even though I haven’t managed to reach forgiveness myself. Learn from my mistakes, and read the following.

Step 1 — Prepare Yourself for Getting Over an Affair

When getting over an affair, it’s important to keep in mind that this will be an insanely hard thing to do. Actually, there won’t be many things as difficult as forgiving a lover for cheating. Despite how hard it is every step of the way, I urge you to stay strong and remember that you love this person. Only true love will keep your bond strong over time. If the love is anything less than true, salvaging the relationship is probably not worth it.

Step 2 — Communication is Key When Forgiving a Cheater

When it comes to forgiving a cheater, open communication is one of the most important things. I’m not saying that a lack of communication is what led your partner to cheat on you in the first place, however making sure that the communication lines stay open in the future is the best way to ensure that nothing is left unsaid, and that both you and your partner always know what’s on each other’s minds.

Step 3 — Let Your Partner Prove Their Loyalty

In endeavors like these, it’s up to your partner to do the bulk of the work. They need to prove themselves to you, and you need to sit back attentively and watch them do it. You can’t prove their loyalty for them, they need to do the hard work themselves.

Step 4 — Give Forgiveness Time

Forgiveness will take time, potentially even years. Again, if your love is true, then the process will be worth all the time in the world. I may never forgive that woman for what she did to me, but I know that you have a chance of finding inner peace and forgiveness if your intentions are true and you remain patient throughout the process.

4 questions to tell you if you can forgive a cheater


How to Forgive a Cheater?

I’ve lived in Montreal my whole life, and I know all about the dynamic dating scene in this city. There are people of all genders, facial types, hair colors, and body types here, and I know that more than most people. I’ve never been married, so I’ve spent most of my life engaged in the Montreal dating scene. From my experience, about half of the people you can possibly be with have the potential inside themselves to cheat on you. That’s right — half the people you meet can possibly cheat on you. That is a truly daunting statistic, but from my experience, it’s totally true. I’ve been in dozens of relationships, and I’ve been cheated on half the time. Some of those times, I actually discovered my partner in the sheets with another person! Those were all really weird images to process, but I managed to get through them. The person I’m with now has actually cheated on me once before, a few months back. It was a really hard time for us to go through, but I’m happy to say that I managed to forgive her for what she did, and now I barely think about it anymore. If you’ve been cheated on, and you’re looking to reach a place of forgiveness, then look no further. I just might be able to give you some tools to help.

Is an Affair Worthy of Forgiveness?

Is an affair worthy of forgiveness? Well, first answer me this: do you still love your partner. I don’t mean ‘like’ or ‘lust’ here, I’m talking about the real deal. If you truly love the person you’re with, then it’s worth giving them another chance after they’ve cheated on you. Love is a singular thing — there’s no one else in the world like your partner, so you can’t replicate that exact kind of love with anyone else but them.

Is your Partner Worthy of Forgiveness?

Think about your partner deeply as a person, and ask yourself if they are worthy of forgiveness. Basically, consider whether they are the type of person to cheat liberally during every opportunity that arises, or if they only have the tendency to cheat once in a relationship, during a moment of extreme personal weakness. If the former is the case, then your efforts might be wasted (unless you’re into the concept of open relationships); if the latter is the case, then your partner might just be worthy of forgiveness.

Is Your Relationship Worth Saving?

Think back on your relationship, and consider all aspects of it. Did the relationship improve the lifestyle and state of mind of both you and your partner? If it did, then it might be in your best interests to preserve the bond you have with your partner for as long as possible, without resulting in pain on either side, of course. Again, if your partner only cheated once in a moment of pure weakness, they might still end up being loyal to you in the long run. Only time will tell.

Do You Still Love Your Partner?

I ask you this again, because it is the most important situation in these circumstances. Do you still love your partner? Is the love totally true? Can they potentially be your soulmate? If the answer is yes to all three, then you should definitely give forgiveness a chance.

Are you giving your partner another chance? Use these 5 steps to forgive a cheater

how forgive a cheaterForgiving A Cheater

How to forgive a cheater: Tell them how you feel

Figuring out why you should forgive a cheater
isn’t an easy decision, but it is one that you need to make. If you have decided to forgive your cheating partner and try to save your relationship, there are a few things for should know. First off, get everything you need to say off your chest as soon as possible. If you begin to keep things in and start neglecting to tell your partner how you feel, you will never be able to forgive them to your fullest capacity. Also, if you show your lover how much they hurt you they will be less inclined to repeat the action because they will remember how sad it made you.

Getting over an affair: Communication is key

Want to stop wondering if he is going to cheat again? In order to do so you need to start working on your communication skills. It’s completely normal for someone to doubt their partner’s dedication after being cheated on, but the feeling shouldn’t last forever. If you and your lover work on your communication problems, you’ll be able to properly express your feelings without having to scream or engage in a fight — which will lower the chances of your partner returning to his old ways.

Forgiving a cheater: Don’t fantasize about getting even

Forgiving someone for cheating is not something you need to do, so if you’ve chosen to do so with ulterior motives in mind — stop right there! Getting even shouldn’t be on your mind when deciding to get back with a cheating ex, especially if you want the relationship to work this time around. Sure, in a perfect world you would be able to show him how much he hurt you, but if he really cares about you, he will be hurting as well but for different reasons. If you’re fantasizing about getting even every chance you get, it might be wise for you to re-evaluate your reasons for getting back with your ex.

Affair forgiveness is necessary for the relationship to continue

When I decided to get back with my ex who cheated on me in Austin, I knew I had to tread wisely. I also knew that in order for the relationship to work, affair forgiveness was the most important thing of all. A relationship cannot evolve if one person is always angry and the other is always trying to show how sorry they are. Affair forgiveness, real forgiveness, allows the couple to turn a fresh page and start being themselves again.

Second chances bring trust issues

If someone cheats on you, they immediately lose all your trust. Still, some people get back with their cheating partners and try to resolve their issues, despite no longer trusting their partners with their lives. Since trust is the base of any healthy relationship, it is miraculous that some of these relationships actually end up lasting and progressively growing stronger. If you’re having second thoughts about getting back with the person you love because they cheated on you, remember that trust can be earned back after a while, and all can be forgiven as long as your partner is serious this time around.